Baby stuff is expensive

I'm expecting my first baby in September and we're trying to stock up on gear and supplies. We were fortunate enough to have a shower where some very generous relatives gave us a lot of the more expensive essentials (crib, pack and play,car seat, stroller, swing) and thanks to coupons and some great deal sites I have already started a fairly large stockpile of diapers and wipes. I thought I was doing well.

Until we started shopping to fill in the rest of the things that we needed. In the past couple weeks we've spent a few hundred dollars just on somewhat small things. I feel like I'm doing something wrong. Everyone writes about how babies aren't really that expensive, but I'm starting to not believe that. I don't feel like I'm impulse shopping or falling prey to a lot of marketing, but I don't have any way of knowing.

There are some things we've seen that I know I realy don't need. For example

• Pacifier wipes/keepers
  
• Wipe warmer
  
• Diaper stacker
  
• A lot of dresses/outfits
  

There are things that I'm pretty sure we do need:

• Onesies in a few different sizes
  
• Socks
  
• Receiving blankets
  
• Crib sheets
  
• Waterproof crib mattress pads
  
• Changing table covers
  
• Burp cloths
  
• Towels and washcloths
  
• Thermometer
  
• Safety gates
  
• Outlet covers/cabinet latches
  
• Monitor
  
• Nursing attire
  

And things that we think we want although maybe don't need

• Boppy/nursing pillow (and waterproof covers)
  
• Diaper pail (and refills)
  
• Baby bathtub
  
• Extra car seat base
  

It adds up to a lot of money very quickly, even if we don't get a lot that we consider extra - and I know I'm still forgetting stuff. I am trying to shop for deals, but it's hard when you feel anxious to just get everything done. Does anyone have advice for things on my need or want list that I could remove, things I don't list that I need, or ways to save money on all of it?

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Don't forget to play

I think, if I could give one piece of advice to people looking for a way to get their lives, money and homes in order it would be this: don't forget to play.

It seems counter-intuitive. I mean, when you feel overwhelmed and there's only so much time in the day to get things done, the instinct is to spend all of it working. If I'm not doing something productive it's a waste.

But the truth is, I don't think the human brain or the universe works that way. When all you do is run around working, sometimes it starts to feel like you're running on a hamster wheel. For example, the more you work, the more tired you are, the more money you spend on conveniences and comforts, the more you have to work. And then there's laundry, which does have the annoying habit of popping back up again once you've gotten it done.

After a while, you feel tempted to just give up. You'll always be in debt, you'll always have laundry piles, you'll always be miserable.

But, when you play, when you budget in time for something you enjoy and totally immerse yourself in it, you feel better. You feel better in a way that you will never feel by earning more money or folding more laundry. Whether it's reading a book, going to the zoo, playing a video game, or throwing a ball around, somehow it is productive in a truer sense than vacuuming is. The reason is, once you've done that, you don't feel so defeated anymore. You don't mind doing some laundry or cooking a nice meal. When I meet a friend for coffee, I don't feel any more tired the next day than if I didn't. In fact, going to work is actually easier.

So, do it, take some time and play. By yourself, with your family, with your friends, it doesn't matter. Just go, be totally unproductive and enjoy yourself. It's amazing how much it will accomplish.

Trying to keep my frugal cool

So even though I moved to a much cooler part of the country this year, I still can't seem to get away from the heat waves. Temperatures here are tipping 90 this week, and I am definitely feeling the heat. Because I'm worried about the effects on my body of overheating at this particular moment, I'm not sure I can keep the air off as long as I have been, but here are some strategies I'm trying to use to hold out a little longer:

1. Keep an eye on the outside temperature. When it drops into the low 70's, open up the windows and air out the apartment. The movement of the air makes a big difference in how cold it feels. However, when the outside temperature is above 80, it's much better to keep the apartment sealed and try to keep the heat out.

2. Turn everything off. Okay, so my laptop is on, but the TV and lights are off, chargers are unplugged, and I'm avoiding running laundry or washing dishes during the hot part of the day.

3. Drink lots of cold water. I have a pitcher in my fridge, but I'm trying not to open it too often, so I am keeping two tall stainless steel water bottles alternately in the fridge. The water stays cooler longer in the bottle than it would in a glass so I can enjoy cool water longer without wasting energy. When it gets even hotter, I may keep a glass of ice too and just pour the water from the bottle over the ice every few minutes.

4. Take cold showers. Normally I shower at night, but if I'm home it's better to take a cool shower at the hottest part of the day and then leave my hair wet to keep me cool a little longer.

5. Air dry clothes. The dryer puts off a ton of heat, and when it's this hot, the clothes dry pretty fast. I don't have a clothesline, so I just drape things over chairs and set the chairs on my deck.

6. Wear seasonally appropriate clothing. I wore a tanktop and my husband's shorts (I don't have any I can fit into anymore) and only got dressed more than that when I had to run errands.

7. Relax. This is not the weather to do any labor intensive chores or to try to do a lot of exercise. I mostly am just sitting around, reading, writing, getting my little hand chores done (like fixing a seam on some pants and filing my papers). When it cools off this evening, I may try to get a more intense house cleaning session in.

8. Eat light and cool food. I absolutely will not turn my oven on once it starts getting hot in the summer. Mostly I rely on my crockpot and toaster oven, neither of which put off as much heat, and sometimes my stovetop, but on days like today I prefer to just eat salads and sandwiches anyway. Cold food won't raise your body temperature, and lighter fare is easier to digest.